Some Recent Exploration(s), 8/25/20

A kind of stream of consciousness of some recent Zenso happenings and/or musings (documented for the hell of it).

What I am exploring is like three things but the things don't matter, it's more about some of the principles I think, which I'll get to in just a bit. So the things are: (1) sprinting (what I sometimes call RunWild I guess) once a week or once every 6 to 9 days or so; (2) playing in movement patterns or actions of power or strength (generally speaking) that I would never want to not be able to have (hack play, getup exploration, any strength play, squatitation, extensiation, jumping, hanging, pulling, hinging, crawling, heaving, stuff like that, whatever; on and on); and (3) walking or strolling, or grounding, or hiking.

And then really, more than these things being so important, it's about principles that through investigation and wonder and experimentation I may be getting to play with.

And some of these principles are based, or all of them based?, from a bioenergetic vantage. No I don't know yet what exactly I mean by "bioenergetic", but I have some thoughts on it… that it (bioenergy) is getting at metabolic processes and healthy cellular functioning in general. So some of these principles that I get to play with, are coming from this lens of bioenergy, or investigating what will allow energy to flow at a level that is mostly in sync with life, developmentally speaking, and which honors an interrelated, in-process nature of whatever is going on here.

It seems so vague, perhaps. But that doesn't concern me now, because what I am trying to do here is get to the heart of what I am thinking and where I am at currently, irrespective of what it might sound like to anybody else, and maybe beyond the limitation of these damn words. It makes some sense to me even though that (sense) also seems an utterly hubris thing to claim!

So a couple of these principles.

One is breathing or being able to breathe easily even during and immediately after intense expression. Retaining more CO2. Diving into more of what that means, on a biological level, to be able to retain and or increase CO2 as a means for playful existence and energetic being. This could mean, for example, nose breathing during bouts of wild animation (in a duration that makes this possible); or nose breathing through the night during sleep. Keeping this in mind or playing with it (the idea and in practice) as it shows up, mostly, within the three things I listed at the outset. That in breath (also in being), there might be an easiness, a gentle, curious inquisitiveness, and open doorways in all directions for finding whatever it is freshly. Just playfulness rather than a bunch of exhaustive slop and beat-head-against-wall-ness.

Another primary principle for me lately, one that is perhaps coexistent with the idea of CO2 being so vital, I don't know, is this: That time under tension or duration of moderate to intense action makes quite a difference to cellular functioning, or that the type of energy pathway to supply ATP in activity may be integral to what's happening inside the cell in terms of efficiency and spunkiness. So then I guess this could be, for example, something like the question of going to failure or not. In other words maybe not going to failure can bring something sexy with it, and that there can be strength gains here and biological processes improved (contrary to conventional "fitness" maxims). That natural potentiation may be able to happen without pushing it to the max or whatever which is so proselytized it seems.

And aside from going to "failure" or not, the question: Are the creatine-phophate and crea-pho-glycotic (I think I made that up to describe the blending of the line between creatine-phosphate and glycolytic energy pathways), preferable in terms of what may be conducive over the long haul to a happy, well-functioning metabolism?

Or the idea of soreness being essential for development or whatever, this idea having no scientific basis when you get into the research; in other words, the soreness might get in the way of recovery and adaptation, and so actually impede any "progress". Note: soreness to me seems to come from two main kinds of behaving (although this is generalized): (1) heavily loaded and/or high-volumed eccentric movements (like going down slowly in a back squat with a relative damn lot of weight) and (2) things that are either entirely novel in terms of movement(s) or haven't been done in a while (like putting a magnet on a fridge over and over and over again with the non-dominant hand hundreds of times in a row). Anyhow, it seems that soreness doesn't have much to do with getting real strong or fit, although it might sometimes find its way into the mix.

Just some things I'm tossing around and want to explore (and research) more deeply, I guess.

And then perhaps another principle, regarding progress or improvement. That nearly everything out there branded as health or fitness or exercise, seems to be on this level of "What can we do to improve ourselves?", or "This will make you better", and marketed in a way of preying on the people (and there are so many to prey on) who have been learned to feel helpless and "less than", to the most-of-all-of-us who live in this culture of guilt and are therefore quite easy to be sold the next amazing fix or solution.

This idea that we are supposed to be needing to do certain things or have to do such and such, to be healthy, seems to be right up there with all of the institutional and corporate hobbledy-gobbledy centralization of power, of getting people wrapped into a system of control and hierarchy and division and growing some few people's pockets at the expense of the actual health and well being of the masses. The thinking that I have to do X, Y, Z in order to optimize my health, or that I need program SnowyGlitter P to grow my strength, or that I should reorder Fifey Trialus in my Fabbernooky so as to improve function of the wallamackey or be better at K; and ironically, all of that fluffy cookie cuttery hoopla, like I said before, just means that I would always be coming from a place of "less than" or "have-to", and generally while feeling dis-connected.

I wonder that I could be in an energetic state, or physiologically in a place of low stress and high play, and that I could even then be somehow convinced by the powerfully marketed drivel, that I need to do more, that I need to do some kind of exercise or fitness system or gadget, and that in so being cajoled and having jumped into that koolaid of whatever sort, I may then actually leave the more naturally-cultivated reservoir of energy that I had, to go down a road of stress and even destruction, all because I was, unfortunately and understandably, swayed to believe I wasn't "enough" and that I "needed" it.

It seems, so often, the people who live long in actuality, and happily, are those who keep thinking and growing and making art with whatever's here as we navigate life, or those who simply do what they love, and feel their way along. That he or she who appears to be both physically active and mentally rich, is perhaps simply the individual who doesn't care too much about getting to this or that [often arbitrary, ungraspable] point, and just lives. In other words, the people who don't care about progress but just enjoy what they're up to, are as far as I can ascertain developed to a higher degree and healthier, comparatively, than anyone trying super hard in the name of betterment. So this may be the most important principle, for reasons of creating habits too, in that some thing, or anything, done simply because it is enjoyed (and so tapped into out of love), is naturally sustainable.

Going along with this principle is the idea that there is not one box for everyone to fit into, as far as any of this goes. That there's no one single "the best" program, ever, especially not the one we're doing, and that the true path if there is a true path is the path which is constantly changing and completely unique built of our own two feet. That with an ongoing curiousness to what it might mean to be an organism, part and parcel, with a greater organism (all of which is in process), we may find that knowledge doesn't keep any better than fish, as Whitehead put it. Plus I'll forget this time and time again (history reminds), making assertions and getting into all kinds of "folly", but yes!, these bumps in the way as the feats, the falls as any "triumphs", each and all of these equal-parts simply what's happening, experience.

It is.

Going along - and as it does, spitting out an "I" to see it and write; and ride. ?

Backwards and then done: There are so many things in the [health and fitness] industry that seem to be marketed as you have to do this to be healthy. Take endurance training or "cardio" or training the wind, etc. I'm not sure this "conditioning" stuff fits into energetics or being energetic. At least personally I doubt it has any place at all. I feel like I wrecked my health after years of intense and regular endurance exercise (more on this part of my fitness / health "story" in episode I of "Brix Island" at The Antigym TV on YouTube). Anyway, this is just another thing I really want to explore as deeply as I can, the question of whether "long distance" or "long duration" jolting-the-joints-and-rattling-the-brain and huffing-and-puffing kind of thing, i.e. "jogging", will ever again have anything to do with health for me?

(Although it's quite possible that it was entirely instrumental that I went through the intense endurance phase when I did, just like it was perhaps necessary that I went through the low-carb, etc., fad diet experiences.)

Note: pleasurable, immersed-in-nature, and forgetting-time experience like hiking or something like that, is not what I'm writing about when I write about intensity-laden endurance-based fitness (think Crossfit or any other exhaustive, rather debilitating activities; like afterward you feel like death or you can't walk for three days kind of shit).

As I bust out of the culture of fitness, so that I can continue to craft a road show that is personally meaningful and resonates (also one that is constantly open to fresh exploration and change), I think another worthy, underlying reminder is that: belief in anything whatsoever may be the death of developing intelligence. Another way of saying this maybe, at least for now, is that relationship and conversation are paramount aspects of whatever evolution may or may not be taking place, and that this discourse, with all life, is everywhere happening and available; and informing newly always, or at least provisionally. And that being outside, unwalled, might be a harbinger to open doors we didn't know existed until we went [t]here, inlets anywhere to experience(s) of felt connection (disconnected for a bit perhaps from fucking tech, electronics, etc.)